"HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST! ARGHHHHHH!" Was my reponse when I heard Asphyx was doing a new album. And they got the mighty Martin Van Drunen back! HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST! ARGHHHHHH! OK sorry, but I'm a HUGE Asphyx fanatic! Even look on "The Rack" thank list and you will see Mike Nelson in there (OUCH! My foot hurts from being a namedropping jerkoff!) See I used to be in contact with drummer Bob Bagchus back in the old days and we would chat, trade shirts, demos and records and all that. Anyways, enough about my lame life. Back to the album HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST! ARGHHHHHH! This fucker is GREAT! The Dutch death metal machine has lost none of it's bite and dare I say they have even become MORE brutal! "Scorbutics" starts the carnage. What a way to start! Fucking mid paced banger at first with shredding riffs, and Martin's trademark howl calling for your death! I think I want to go next door and kill the neighbors! OH SHIT! Then the classic Asphyx fast one two beat comes in! CLASSIC! Martin sounds like a man possessed as usual. There is a brutal break during the chorus and then fast again. Back and forth, death and metal. Whew, drains you listening to such perfection. The title of the album SAYS IT ALL! Yes, Asphyx play some of the simplest riffs and drum beats around but THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT wanking "brutal death metal" garbage dispoasal/sprinkler core fans! ONE Asphyx riff crushes a million of yours! hahaha. "The Herald" comes next and is more of the same, which is great. Then the classic Hellhammer influence that Asphyx always has comes in. Nice and slow and doomy. The fast comes back at the end. Nice and old school skanks to headbang to! "Bloodswamp" opens with a bloodswamp of riffs and then picks up pace to pummel you. The middle has one of the heaviest riffs on the album and slows it down a bit, then returns to kill. "Death...The Brutal Way" is next! HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST! This is my favorite song on here. It makes me want to go out and kill the whole neighborhood! FUCK WHAT A BANGER! Total fast and chaotic madness! Crushes everything in it's path. Then a slow doomy passage comes to give us a break! THANK YOU! MY HEAD WAS GOING TO FALL OFF! Oh shit, it's starting to pick up again! HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST! Here we go again! GREAT SONG! "Asphyx 2(They Died As They Marched)" comes next and it starts off in that same classic slow doomy style. HEAVY AS FUCK! This one is nice and slow. The end reminds me of old Paradise Lost when they were death/doom. "Eisenbahnmorser" is next and starts with guitar noise then kicks in with another great fast part. Remember, fast for Asphyx is that one two beat. Still a deadly beat to this day after all these years! The next part goes mid paced banger with Martin calling the hellfire as usual. "Black Hole Storm" starts out with a creepy, horror movie style intro. Then the riff kicks in, in tune with the intro, only to go into up temp mid paced part. A slow part kicks in and as usual, Asphyx does the slow parts right. Never boring, always come in right and end at the right time. "Riflegun Redeemer" is next. Starts slower, then picks up to what? THE CLASSIC ASPHYX FAST PART! YEAH YEAH YEAH I KNOW! IT FUCKING RULES! All the songs are great, but this song and the title track are my absolute favorites. "Cape Horn" comes next. Nice and slow with a killer creepy guitar solo over the top. Picks up to mid paced and goes doomy again, then gets fast. It then ends with the creepy solo. KILLER. Finally, after all of this classic madness, we have come to the end. I will hold my tears as Asphyx would laugh at me and kick my ass if I cried in front of them, but all good things come to and end right? Yes this album has to end so the last song is "The Saw, The Torture, The Pain". This is an insturmental and is a slow and doomy one with a deadly riff. WOW, what an album! Asphyx have always created some of the best old school death metal around and it is an honor to have them back. The balls and heart heard here brings back memories of those great olden days when death metal still had a connection with METAL and not jazz or classical or outside influences that cram a million riffs into one song. This album makes you headbang and raise your fist and horns! So, don't tell Asphyx, I'm going to go cry now, OH WAIT! I CAN PLAY IT AGAIN YEAH! WHEW HEW! Oh, did I mention HOLY SHIT FUCK TITTY FUCKING CHRIST!? This album will make you say that as well! Hails to John/Ibex Moon for getting this album out in the U.S.!
Review By: Mike Abominator 10/10
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